Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize