Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
