Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
