winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
and you fell through a lawn chair
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
