I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
