an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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