that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
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Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
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Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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