My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
dude i'm inner monologue high
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
my poor anus
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
