he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
