Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
