Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
