brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize