Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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