Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
