we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
