no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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