i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
