Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
wat bout pragnant strippers??
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
