Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
