but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
