He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
