I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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