is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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