The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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