Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
