This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
