I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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