If that was your dad, he is hot
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
