Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize