I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
What happened to fro yo and sex?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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