somebody snuck up and got me drunk
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
