Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize