Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.