You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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