I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize