Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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