my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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