I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
