BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Randomize
