So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
