the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize