It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Sponge bath it is.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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