so that wasnt chicken after all
one two three fourrrrnication!
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize