Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Just puked most of my soul out..
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize