Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize