Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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