She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
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Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window