Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
