I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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