Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
