only you would photoshop your dick
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
