I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize